But anyways, we spent a lot of time trying to come up with new Olympic events. It's not so uncommon to do that, I think, especially when you're feeling like the commentator during the synchronized diving competition is a condescending harpy. Anyways, among the events we were most enthused about are:
- Marco Polo.
- The Barathalon. (Darts, billiards, Pac-Man, and bowling, in a single brutal day)
- The Suburbathalon. (Lawn darts, bocci ball, lawn sprinkler jumping, and Slip-N-Slide, in a single brutal day)
- Speed Reading.
- Break dancing.
- Freestyle karaoke.
- Synchronized falling in the pool.
These are just suggestions. Also, we feel that interest in the Olympics would increase if the gold medal winner(s) in each event were forced to sing their national anthem for the audience from the podium. This idea brings together the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat, since I assume most of these kids (is it just me, or do they all look really young?) don't have phenomenal singing voices. It'd give the whole event an "American Idol"-type edge. Maybe at the end, there could be a phone-in vote for who had the best anthem performance.
The problem with the Olympics is, I don't usually want the Americans to win. Or ever, actually. I want to see every country win something, which I don't think is even possible. (To be honest, I usually want whichever competitors are the cutest to win. I wanted the Romanians to win men's gymnastics today; it was awful when that kid fell off the bar. Why were all the gymnasts having such a difficult time landing when they leaped over the pommel horse? It seemed like none of them had a great landing; are they supposed to have a good landing? I suspected that maybe the mat they were landing on wasn't firm enough.)
Song: "Do It Now" [Knee Deep Club Mix] by Dubtribe Sound System
3 comments:
I actually really like the idea of a Trading Spaces thing at the Olympics. They could get "Handy Andy" from Changing Rooms to be a commentator, and every single American will go to bed wondering what it was that he was going on about for all that time. Perfect!
I watch some CBC news occasionally, but a lot of it is (understandably) about Canadian stuff that I don't always get. I watch it a good deal more than any of the news television here; I can't stand watching any of them, because they mention some horrible catastrophe in a country most Americans can't find on a map, and then spend 15 minutes telling us about "The Fleecing of America". As far as I'm concerned, devoting a huge chunk of the nightly news to the dangers of internet pyramid schemes is the REAL fleecing of America.
I get most of my news from NPR, BBC, CBC radio (which features the only classical music on the Detroit airwaves!) and the Daily Show with John Stewart.
Your fine country may be experiencing a dearth of medals so far, but Canada doesn't suck; I get to go there next week, to the Stratford Festival! (Huzzah!) Crossing the border to get into -- or rather, out of -- Canada does suck though.
Did you know the IOC officially recognizes Bridge as a sport? This is true!
BtVS rules!
Well, I'm such a nerd I have the Cordelia action figure displayed in my room. And a Willow action figure in my closet... which is actually pretty ironic.
Next week after summer semester is over we're going to see MacBeth (I insisted, the only versions of this that I've seen was Kurosawa's "Throne of Blood", and Roman Polanski's version with the topless old ladies) and Anything Goes ( I *heart* Cole Porter), We may be going to see something else, but I forget.
I'm jealous that you have Clem's autograph!
After Buffy and Angel were cancelled, I thought they ought to have a spin-off, a sitcom with Lorne and Clem as roommates. Like The Odd Couple, only with really amiable demon roommates. Harmony could live in the apartment upstairs and be like a vampire Rhoda. And all the people from the other two shows could show up during sweeps. I figure if the Mary Tyler Moore Show could have a spin-off that was a drama ("Lou Grant"), it ought to be able to go the other way, too.
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