The Bat (1959)
Michelle presented us with this cinematic treasure, a remake of "The Bat Whispers", the thriller that allegedly helped inspire Bob Kane to create Batman. It was on a 3-fer of Vincent Price movies, with "House on Haunted Hill" and "The Last Man on Earth" -- I've seen the former, and the latter sounded less promising. "The Bat" starred Vincent Price and Agnes Moorehead -- best known as Endora on Bewitched, but also one of the actors Orson Welles brought from the Mercury Theater in order to film Citizen Kane. So, you know, that's a bit of a pedigree. Thankfully, though, the film didn't live up to that pedigree.
The film was absolutely goofy; it made virtually no sense at all. New characters were still being introduced in the last third of the movie, while previously introduced characters never showed up again, prompting me to quip, "What the hell is this? A Robert Altman movie?" I guess you sort of had to be there. The women were all wearing the strangest dresses, apparently with several pounds of petticoats underneath. At one point, Ms. Moorehead had on a skirt that was globular, and not the type of thing I think I would want to wear when solving crimes where women are being de-jugulared. The plot is basically "Murder, She Wrote": Agnes is a mystery writer, and finds herself in a house with a terrible secret. And, strangely enough, a bevy of young women sleeping together, which brings up all sorts of questions.
**SPOILERS (if you care)** Poor Vincent Price's character has all the evidence pointing at him: he's obsessed with bats, he always (ALWAYS) shows up when the titular character is about. And when the Bat gets a fire iron to the side of the head and flees, poor Vincent shows up minutes later, bleeding from the ear. He just coincidentally was in a car crash while leaving the house earlier that night. Right, Vincent, you old rascal you! Only he really was in a car crash, and he really isn't the Bat; it really was all a kooky coinkidink! Amazing! Of course, he dies anyways, because he shot someone for some reason of other... I'm guessing it was for the money. Did I mention the money that someone embezzled from the local bank? **END SPOILERS (if you care)**
The Bat himself is like a cut-rate Freddy Krueger, with claws on one hand (hence the de-jugularizing) and a fedora he wears on top of the black hood that disguises the criminals identity. At one point he can't get into a bedroom with two luscious lovelies -- well, Agnes and her hysterical gal-pal -- so he slips a bat through the window above the door. The bat is really, really fake -- not quite Dark Shadows fake, with rubber wings flopping and the string showing clearly, but it was pretty dang close. And the bat, in spite of everything known about bats, immediately flops over to the gal-pal and bites her. She starts screaming about how she's going to get "The Rabies!" (really!) The frightened bat flies into the closet, until Price shows up and starts going on about looking at the bats brain under a microscope. Poor bat! A pawn in the petty cruelties of humanity!
Overall, the film was a delight, especially since three of us (Julie, Michelle, & myself) would have graduate degrees in MST3K if they offered them. Mike isn't even enrolled in the MST3K program, so his exclamations amounted to a sort of gospel call-and-response bit after one of the three of us hurled a particularly juicy zinger; eg, "You know?", "Exactly!", "I hear ya, man!" Which is OK; we don't need another person making references to Roland Gift or The Snoop Sisters. This film is HIGHLY recommended, but only if you have a comparable circle of friends who have no problem making with the educated zingers, but at the same time can do it with affection, rather than malice. I mean, sure, it may make little or no sense, but these ARE Agnes Moorehead and Vincent Price; they deserve respect, Dagwood!
**
Starsky & Hutch (2004)
We also watched this movie, which I kept silent through, more or less. This was Mike's choice, and I've learned that Mike needs to be compensated for every movie of ours that he hates -- I call it the Dogville Effect. It was better than I expected, but I really dislike Owen Wilson and Ben Stiller, so I wasn't expecting a great deal. I laughed a couple times, but really, there wasn't that much there, and so I just patiently waited it out. What else can I do? Diplomacy among my circle of friends is the key. The scenes with Snoop Dogg were funny, though: "Luxembourg."
**
The muscles in the bottom of my arm hurt today; I think it's because I didn't warm-up or stretch out sufficiently when I was working out. It's gotten worse as the day has progressed, and I'm sure my typing all this isn't helping. So I'll quit now.
Song: "Temptation", Heaven 17.
Michelle presented us with this cinematic treasure, a remake of "The Bat Whispers", the thriller that allegedly helped inspire Bob Kane to create Batman. It was on a 3-fer of Vincent Price movies, with "House on Haunted Hill" and "The Last Man on Earth" -- I've seen the former, and the latter sounded less promising. "The Bat" starred Vincent Price and Agnes Moorehead -- best known as Endora on Bewitched, but also one of the actors Orson Welles brought from the Mercury Theater in order to film Citizen Kane. So, you know, that's a bit of a pedigree. Thankfully, though, the film didn't live up to that pedigree.
The film was absolutely goofy; it made virtually no sense at all. New characters were still being introduced in the last third of the movie, while previously introduced characters never showed up again, prompting me to quip, "What the hell is this? A Robert Altman movie?" I guess you sort of had to be there. The women were all wearing the strangest dresses, apparently with several pounds of petticoats underneath. At one point, Ms. Moorehead had on a skirt that was globular, and not the type of thing I think I would want to wear when solving crimes where women are being de-jugulared. The plot is basically "Murder, She Wrote": Agnes is a mystery writer, and finds herself in a house with a terrible secret. And, strangely enough, a bevy of young women sleeping together, which brings up all sorts of questions.
**SPOILERS (if you care)** Poor Vincent Price's character has all the evidence pointing at him: he's obsessed with bats, he always (ALWAYS) shows up when the titular character is about. And when the Bat gets a fire iron to the side of the head and flees, poor Vincent shows up minutes later, bleeding from the ear. He just coincidentally was in a car crash while leaving the house earlier that night. Right, Vincent, you old rascal you! Only he really was in a car crash, and he really isn't the Bat; it really was all a kooky coinkidink! Amazing! Of course, he dies anyways, because he shot someone for some reason of other... I'm guessing it was for the money. Did I mention the money that someone embezzled from the local bank? **END SPOILERS (if you care)**
The Bat himself is like a cut-rate Freddy Krueger, with claws on one hand (hence the de-jugularizing) and a fedora he wears on top of the black hood that disguises the criminals identity. At one point he can't get into a bedroom with two luscious lovelies -- well, Agnes and her hysterical gal-pal -- so he slips a bat through the window above the door. The bat is really, really fake -- not quite Dark Shadows fake, with rubber wings flopping and the string showing clearly, but it was pretty dang close. And the bat, in spite of everything known about bats, immediately flops over to the gal-pal and bites her. She starts screaming about how she's going to get "The Rabies!" (really!) The frightened bat flies into the closet, until Price shows up and starts going on about looking at the bats brain under a microscope. Poor bat! A pawn in the petty cruelties of humanity!
Overall, the film was a delight, especially since three of us (Julie, Michelle, & myself) would have graduate degrees in MST3K if they offered them. Mike isn't even enrolled in the MST3K program, so his exclamations amounted to a sort of gospel call-and-response bit after one of the three of us hurled a particularly juicy zinger; eg, "You know?", "Exactly!", "I hear ya, man!" Which is OK; we don't need another person making references to Roland Gift or The Snoop Sisters. This film is HIGHLY recommended, but only if you have a comparable circle of friends who have no problem making with the educated zingers, but at the same time can do it with affection, rather than malice. I mean, sure, it may make little or no sense, but these ARE Agnes Moorehead and Vincent Price; they deserve respect, Dagwood!
**
Starsky & Hutch (2004)
We also watched this movie, which I kept silent through, more or less. This was Mike's choice, and I've learned that Mike needs to be compensated for every movie of ours that he hates -- I call it the Dogville Effect. It was better than I expected, but I really dislike Owen Wilson and Ben Stiller, so I wasn't expecting a great deal. I laughed a couple times, but really, there wasn't that much there, and so I just patiently waited it out. What else can I do? Diplomacy among my circle of friends is the key. The scenes with Snoop Dogg were funny, though: "Luxembourg."
**
The muscles in the bottom of my arm hurt today; I think it's because I didn't warm-up or stretch out sufficiently when I was working out. It's gotten worse as the day has progressed, and I'm sure my typing all this isn't helping. So I'll quit now.
Song: "Temptation", Heaven 17.
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